Not the person she'd thought he was
by RoseScor90
Summary: Lily Evans had never been so surprised in her life as when she learned who had written the lines on the pieces of parchment that lay scattered on the commonroom floor. Completely in James' POV!


Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Harry Potter characters…

A/n: Written for the Random Competition by Aiimy! The prompt I had got was 'poetry' and the song was 'Haven't Met You Yet' by Michel Buble!

"Again with the poetry, Prongs?" my closest friend, and almost brother shook his head before seating himself beside me on the couch. I looked up at him for a second before I bent back. He sighed for the umpteenth time today, settling himself more comfortably on the couch. He finds my 'artistic impulse' as he calls it, frustrating. I don't blame him. I would be irritated too, if suddenly Remus took an interest in ballet dancing. Not that he will but just supposing. And my friends have been nothing but supportive of me, only they thought I could be a bit less passionate about it. But it wasn't something I could help.

"Come on Prongs! How long has it been since we've pulled a prank on the Slytherins? A decade? They're going to think we're leaving them alone! Oh, for the love of all….hide the scrolls Prongs" he said in a rush and I obeyed him immediately. He had been watching the map.

I had just stuffed the last bunch of parchment rolls into my book bag when the portrait hole opened and she came in. I don't think there's any necessity for me to tell you who. You could just figure it out from the way Sirius rolls his eyes at the expression on my face. I'm sure it must have been something akin to blatant admiration. And there was no way I could hide it.

I thanked the gods above for not letting her notice my dumbstruck look. She noticed the two of us sitting there and smiled, her whole face lighting up. She really was too beautiful. That simply wasn't fair! "Hey James! Black" she nodded to Sirius. She still hadn't forgiven him for putting Snape's life and Remus' secret in jeopardy. Yes, she did know Remus' secret and what had happened two years before. She, unfortunately, had been in the Hospital Wing when Snape had been brought in and he, being the big tattletale he was, had blurted everything to her. We, me, Sirius and Peter, had been wary at first, me more than the rest. If Lily turned out to be like Snape, it would be unbearable for me. She had been angry, yes. But because we hadn't told her before, thank god! She had assisted in helping Moony ever since.

When we became heads, we simply brought Moony back here, since it was too dangerous for Madame Pompfrey when other students were in there. Lily was now almost as trained in healing Moony as the nurse. Another thing to add to the already too long list of the things I admired about her.

"James? James? Prongs!" Sirius stepped on my foot to get my attention.

"Ow! You don't have to be so violent!" I complained to Sirius who merely laughed. Even Lily was trying to hold back her laughter. Had I zoned out again?

"I haven't got much time for my date, you know" Sirius shrugged before leaving the portrait hole in a hurry.

"He'd better not say that to Em. She'd have his head" Lily said before settling down on her favorite couch by the large fireplace. Personally, I did not understand all the hussle about it. Sure you'll be warm during winter, but is it really worth the stare from the portraits hanging above? The past Heads had both been Hufflepuffs and they were unusually kind towards whoever came in. But they did stare in that unsettling way at you. Lily didn't mind though.

"Are you even listening to me?"

Huh?

"Pardon?"

"You're incorrigible James. What is so captivating that you can't even listen to what people are saying?"

"Sorry. Won't happen again. What were you saying?"

"Oh! Just that I found a piece of parchment lying on the table yesterday"

"Um…what's so intriguing about that?"

"Well, there were a few lines written on it. Sort of like a poem. You have any idea who wrote it?"

Uh oh! "No, no idea. Guess it must have been one of Sirius' fangirls' attempts"

"I dunno. It seemed like it was written by a guy. Do you think Black is into poetry?"

"No way! Must have been some random piece of parchment then. Lord knows there are enough in here"

That was true. Living in a room where hundreds of heads had lived before tends to get trying when random bits of parchments, hidden by them, float from their hiding places, behind the shelves of books mostly, to litter the commonroom floor.

"Oh! But it seemed like a new piece of parchment. The ink was pretty clear" There was only one explanation to why she was pushing this so much. One I wasn't too keen on acknowledging.

She knew. But who could have told her? There was only one person outside the Marauders who knew about this. I was going to have a serious talk with Emma White when I next see her. My face must have been expressing my thoughts, for her next words were guarded and apologizing.

"Am I upsetting you? I was just curious" she looked at me with wide innocent eyes and I was done for. There was absolutely no way I could resist giving in when she looked all child-like and excited.

"No. Who told you?" I asked, sighing dejectedly.

"Told me what?"

"There's no need to act, Lily. Who told you that I was the one who wrote that?"

"You wrote that!" She said I seriously considered jumping out the window. Idiot! Idiot! Idiot! You just couldn't keep your mouth shut like everyone else, could you? You just had to go and blurt out everything!

I looked at her carefully for any reaction. There were many. She was surprised at first; it then turned to disbelief, I could literally hear her mind fight against the truth; then it turned suspicious and finally it settled on incredulity.

"You're lying" she said, and I sighed. This was nothing new. Whenever Lily discovers something that is not in accordance with her James-Potter-is-an-arrogant-toe-rag policy, she either accuses me of lying or pretends that she is uncaring. Personally, I thought the first option was better.

"I'm not. Accept it or not, I wrote that" She remained staring at me for a bit, obviously trying to find a note of untruth in my words. Finding none, her eyebrows shot up even higher, in apparent danger of merging with her hair.

"You…write. Poems" The words were broken and hesitant. As if she was trying to seem accepting while not really believing it at all. I would have proved to her right there but I was still unsure. Not about what would ensue. Not about whether she'd ever agree to go out with me. I already knew the answer to that was a big no coupled either with a comment on the vanity of the Giant Squid or on the flying capability of pigs. In short, never.

But I was unsure as to what she'll think of me now. An arrogant bully who pesters her to go out with her and who writes poetry? While my mind was pondering the possibilities, my head was nodding to her question. "Can I see them?" she asked, smiling suddenly. It took me a minute to recover from her blinding smile and shrug.

"They aren't very good. I'm just an amateur. I write whatever I feel like. Sirius says I'm just wasting parchment over y…Yeah, and Remus says my writing has neither reason nor rhyme but that it makes sense. Do you understand that?"

If there was one person on this planet who could understand Remus' cryptic messages, it was Lily. "Yeah. What he means to say is that you write well but it needs to be a bit more organized"

"Oh!"

"So? Can I read them? Just a few? It's alright if you don't want to show them to me" she ended, but her face showed very clearly that she would mind very much if I said no. And, nothing too bad could happen from her reading them. She had already read one anyway. So I dove in my rucksack, pulling out a few pieces of parchment, and handed them to her.

Her eyes roamed over the pages so fast, I was afraid I'd get cross eyed if I followed them. She kept biting her lip, a clear sign that she was really concentrating on reading. When she lifted her eyes, they were the brightest I had ever seen.

"This is…wow! I knew you wrote _well_ but this is just…amazing! It's just so emotional and so bold!" she said and I felt like I was on cloud nine. That was the first time she had admitted that I was good at anything other than pranking Slytherins.

"You knew!" I asked appalled. If she had read more, it meant she would have come across ones that would have been about her. Oh no!

"Yeah! You tend to leave them lying on the floor often. And after seven years' worth of letters and notes, I became acquainted with your handwriting. I just didn't want to admit it to myself" she admitted, a sheepish smile on her face. I did not know what to say. It was a nightmare all over again. I knew she liked the poems and she probably knew some of them were about her. But that changed neither the way she looked at me nor the answer she gave me. It had become a rather sadistic routine for me, getting my hopes up and have them crash down with a word from her.

"I'm sorry. It must have been irritating to find scraps of parchment every day on the commonroom floor"

"Sorry? Really James! You are so naïve! I liked the poems very much!"

"Even though you knew they were…" I stopped, knowing she'd know what I meant.

"Yes, knowing you'd written about me. It was nice, you know? Noone ever wrote me _poems_! And it was a bit different from what you normally do. You know? The ask-Lily-out-every-five-seconds thing? It was different"

"Good different?"

"Definitely. It was as if I was seeing someone else. Someone beside the prankster persona. That was why I never yelled at you much this year. Because I knew you actually cared. But there wasn't much opportunity for me to yell at all…" she left off and I had a queer feeling that she was hiding something. And then it dawned on me. Of course! I had stopped asking her out! So, did this mean she _wanted_ me to ask her out?

I felt horrible now. Torn. One part of me, the confident part that was sure of Lily's words, pushed me to hope. But there was this other part of me, the one that had faced a million and more rejections, that stopped me in my tracks.

"Yeah, I guess. Must have been a peaceful year for you?" I asked, trying to understand her reactions. They only kindled my hope further and I had almost worked myself up to ask her the dratted question when I stopped myself. Coward! Yes, I was a coward. But it was rejection I was afraid of not her. Because noone could ever be afraid of an angel, could they?

"May be. But it certainly wasn't my happiest" she sighed, sitting down on the couch beside me, where Sirius had been sitting minutes before. And I knew what she meant. Her…friendship with Sniv…Snape had been at its worst this year. He had, as far as rumors said, joined the gang of Dark Wizards who called themselves the followers of Lord Voldemort. Lily had been distraught. She had tried talking to him, but he had been so cold to her that she had stopped trying.

"Snape?"

"Yeah! I don't understand why he'd do something like this! Sure he is a Slytherin but, that doesn't mean he has to join them!"

"May be he had no choice" I said and tried hard not to laugh. We must have entered an Alternate Universe. Why else would I be trying to justify the actions of my sworn enemy?

"You shouldn't say things you don't believe yourself, James" I merely shrugged. She was right this time over.

We remained silent for sometime, neither too interested in talking. We were comfortable this way. She had so many things to think over and I…I was just content with looking at her face this close.

If I hadn't already fallen in love with her, I would have then. I dared to, because I knew, that one day it will work out. That one day she'll atleast like me back.

That one day she'll see me as James rather than that annoying Potter brat.

A/n: Review!


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